Saturday, May 12, 2012

From Boo-Boo-Fixer To Best Friend: The Value of Mothers

{By Rebekah Kimminau}

The title of this post is kind of an oxymoron. Mothers are amazing people, and though people may try to pin down their value, really, there is no set "value" of a mother. Because they are pricless.

My own mother has been a true testament of what a mother should look like. She has influenced just about everything I do - for good - and she is one of the many people I can't imagine my life without.

I think when you are younger, you don't really think about the value of your mother. She is someone who is there for you when you scrape your knee, she is the person who knows how to make the perfect braid, and for me, she was the teacher who I went to anytime I had a question in school. But as you grow up, and start doing things independently, going places on your own, without your mom, you start to learn that all the little things she did for you add up. 

And the older I have gotten, the more I have realized this. I was traveling with families for about 3 months of this past spring. I had a wonderful time, and many of the moms I nanny for are like my second mom, but, that being said, there is just no one like Mom. After being gone from my mom for quite some time, I started to realized, that soon I will be gone even longer (to midwifery school, and maybe eventually married.) And that I really didn't treasure my mom, and the times we spent together nearly as much as I should have. Especially during my teenage years. Between the time I was about 12-15 I went through the "normal" teenage phase. I was mad at the world, and since my world consisted of spending a lot of time with my mom, I was especially mad at her. I had a bad attitude towards her a lot of the time, and God bless her, I don't know how she handled me. But as I reflect back on those years, I regret everyone of the angry words spoken to her. This is the woman who not only carried me for 9 months and birthed me, but the person who put up with my colicky self for a year and then proceeded to spend many an hours planning things for my siblings and I to do, not even mentioning the cleaning, the cooking,  and the homeschooling. And a lot of the time I spent with her  during those years was not pleasant.

But when I was 15, and a lot of my attitude had improved, I started enjoying time with her again. And boy, how my life changed! We started spending time together, going on bike rides some afternoons around the neighborhood, and each night I would go in to get my hair braided for bed, and we would talk about the day. I found that when I opened up to her, and spent time with her, not only talking at her, but also listening to her, my attitude towards her changed. This is the same as in any other relationship you have; communication is KEY. These times are memories that will forever live in my mind. We talked about anything and everything. And as our schedules changed, we moved to a new city, and the times we spent together didn't work so well anymore, I found myself not only missing the times spent with her, but my attitude towards her was starting to go down hill again. Over the past few years I have continually worked on our relationship, and now have the most beautiful relationship I could ever imagine. Don't get me wrong. There were hard times. There were (and still are) times when she asks me to do stuff I don't want to do, and there are also still times when I don't respond in godly way towards her. But God taught me, (and is teaching me) that my relationship with my mother should be a priority in my life. Because God certainly gave us mothers for a reason. 

I am now 18, and our relationship has taken a turn. She is slowly backing out of the role as teacher and instructor, and more and more becoming my best friend. And though I will always look to her for godly wisdom and insight on things I don't have the years to understand, I am enjoying our moments of friendship so very much. We have started taking walks whenever we can squeeze them in (even if it's just 10 minutes to walk to our local RedBox and pick up a movie for movie night.) These walks not only give us a chance for some exercise and fresh air, but they also give us undivided time in which we can talk about life, I can gain wisdom on situations I have been wondering about, and she can talk to me about what has been going on. 

So I want to end by encouraging you, if you don't have a time you spend alone with your mom, find one. It can be something as simple as a 10 minute walk everyday, to going to the gym with her, doing the dishes with her each night, helping her bathe the little kids, making lunch together, sitting on the front porch for a few minutes each day, really, the possibilities are endless! You guys will not only get to know what’s going on in each other's life, but I am sure you will be able to glean some wisdom from her! (She has been alive a few more years than you, after all!)

This post is dedicated to my mother. For the woman who bathed me, changed me, taught me, led me to my Savior, and helped me thorough many situations I could not have gone through without her, Thank you. I treasure our Friendship higher then any other friendship in this world. You are a woman who I highly respect, and hope to have conversations for years to come. I praise God for you often.

What is one thing that your mother has taught you? What is something she always says?

1 comment:

  1. Wow! Thank you my precious daughter. What a beautiful gift.