Monday, November 7, 2011

Top 3 Things I've Learned About Relating to Guys {Part 2}

Contrary to popular portrayal, relationships of all kinds take work. [Happily-ever-after is less fairy dust and more elbow grease.] That is why approaching relationships intentionally and learning from others experience can be so incredibly valuable. Does that mean everything said here will be true for the guys in your life? I’m betting not. This is merely the sharing of what these women have learned through their experiences. Still, is there a lot we can learn from what others find true? I think yes. I mean, learning everything first hand is always an option, but it’s never bad to gain a little insight from those who are farther along the path…

"Every Guy Wants to be a Hero"
...Relating to Guys According to the 20-Something
1. Guys aren't complicated. If a guy says it, he (generally) means it. Don't go reading into what they are saying. If a guy likes you, you won't have to read into his words. He'll make it plain.
2. Every guy wants to be a hero. It makes them feel manly. The best thing you can do to build up a man is to make him feel like he's rescued you. It can be hard to do (after all, we're strong women!) but even doing something like saying "thank you" will go far. Men light up when a woman notices that they have done something, even a little thing. If you bring it up and praise him, it will make his day.
3. Guys are fragile. They don't wear their heart on their sleeves because they are afraid of them breaking. If a guy opens up to you, respect his confidence and trust he's placed in your hands. It takes a lot for a guy to spill his guts. You can be sarcastic with him in private but in public, he'll wonder if that's what you really think about him.

"Real Men are Hard to Come By"
...Relating to Guys According to the Wife of a Manly Man
(This is what I mean... wired differently.)
1. I know this sounds insanely simple but I am just coming to fully appreciate how deeply and innately differently women and men are wired. It is an amazing gift brought to the marriage relationship that God designed perfectly to compliment the other. I love it!
2. Beneath the tough crust is just a human being wanting to be loved and cherished despite sometimes the rough edges or prickliness that makes a man, a Man. 
3. Again simply, I am amazed at the males’ ability to compartmentalize.
ALSO: (4. Real men are hard to come by. Appreciate him, if you have one. 5One of my very favorite things is watching my husband work on things, cars, boats, tractors name it, I love going outside and sitting by while my man lays beneath a piece of equipment, fixin’ things with tools.  I love it. Many a time over the past 29 years has found me just sitting by, watching.

That whole idea that men like to be beside each other doing something rather than talking is really true.  Recently, my man as we sit varnishing furniture: "Hey honey watcha thinking about?" Twenty minutes later I ramble to a close and say after a few minutes: "what about you?" and my man replies "Nothing, that’s the beauty of painting you don’t have to be thinking about anything." :) Silence.)


  1. really fun to read the insights. i definitely vote for learning from others whenever possible, so much less painful! thanks for the helping hand

  2. I loved this! Especially the quote at the end. Too cute! :)
    I would also add that guys want to feel in control and like they know the answers to everything. So just keeping quiet every now and then and not arguing over small things will make them enjoy being around you so much more!

  3. I really appreciate the 3rd point under "Every Guy Wants to be a Hero." I would never have thought of that.

  4. ^ me too. never would have been able to express it as well, but it's something i've learned too.