Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Don't Be That Girl #4 & 5: The Perfect One and the Day Time TV Guest

{Michael Vuke}

If you haven't read part one, two, or three in the "Don't Be That Girl" series, go back and read them now!

What do you mean 'emotion'?
Life isn't
 always perpetually bland
and perfect for you?
Part Four: The Perfect One and the Day Time TV Guest 

The last two types really go together, as different as they are; they are opposite ends on the spectrum of transparency. First up, there is the perfect girl.

Yep, guys avoid “Perfect Girls”. How do you know if you are the Perfect One? If you never show any emotion except for happiness and contentment even when your life is going down the tubes, you are the perfect girl. When you are at a close friend’s funeral, someone tries to comfort you, and your response is: “I’m fine. I don’t need to talk about it.” You are the perfect girl.

Perfect girls never get sad or lonely; they are self-sufficient and happy with their lives (but not really). On the inside, they are hurting and lonely; they experience emotions just like everybody else. Unlike everyone else though, they are ‘too strong’ to let it show. They put on a big happy mask and live a fa├žade. They are a Barbie Doll personified.

Why do we care?

Guys avoid Perfect Girls because you can’t get to know them--there are too many walls in place for any sort of meaningful relationship to develop. Perfect Girls are always hiding something and refusing to trust others with anything, but trust is vital to a friendship. Even if a guy can’t fix your problem, some would be glad to just listen. No one likes being lied to and being given a plastic mannequin for a friend, so we avoid them altogether.

Well, if we avoid Perfect Girls because they never show any emotion or any of the struggles they are experiencing, we must flock to girls who have lots of problems, right? 
No comment necessary.
That brings us to the final type (for now) of girl that guys avoid. The Day-time Talk Show Guest. If you have ever seen an episode of Maury or Jerry Springer, you know exactly what I’m talking about. These girls have more issues than Time magazine, and they flaunt them. As soon as you meet one, you are overwhelmed with information about their problems, emotions, and friend’s problems.

How can you tell if you are one? If you are having a bad day, do you go around wailing and sobbing uncontrollably, clutching the nearest friend for comfort? If you are mad, do you rant to anyone around about that backstabbing little jerk who dared to wear the same shirt as you? If you are one of these girls, whatever you feel, think, or hear will quickly change your mood and get dumped all over your nearest acquaintance. These girls often suffer from the medical condition known as Dramaticus Queeninitus.

Why do we care?

Do I even have to answer this one? Yeah…..no. This isn’t just guys—this is everyone. No one wants to be constantly subjected to every mood swing or bad thing that happens to you. Everyone has some junk in their lives, and we don’t mind listening or helping you remove that junk, but we also aren’t garbage disposals. We have stuff going on in our own lives. Plus, if you are that sort of girl, we can’t entrust any personal details to you, for fear that it would trigger a mood swing or that you would cry/rant/beam about it to your next friend.

Compare those last two girls (the Perfect One and the Day-time TV guest) to the Honest One. This lady isn’t afraid to be real about her life and whatever is happening, but she also knows when the appropriate time and place is to divulge personal information. She is accessible without baring her soul to everyone that walks by. The Honest One also knows what information should be shared with her guy friends, and what information should be reserved for her lady friends. She is balanced, which is something that every girl on the list of girls that guys like has in common. While there is wide variety in personalities, from quiet to adventurous, they all have some form of balance to their lives.

There you have it: 5 types of girls that guys avoid (and 4 types of girls that we like!). I say this on behalf of men everywhere: Please, don’t be that girl.

What are your thoughts on these last two types of girls? Comment below!

Michael Vuke doesn’t want to be that girl. In fact, he rather likes being a guy! He strives to become a well-rounded man, and so is pursuing his varying interests from fashion to camping to learning Japanese. Have any questions about guys/for guys? Tweet it out to @WriteandDream and it may get answered in an article! Michael blogs about his discoveries at michaelvuke.wordpress.com.


  1. I found your articles quite interesting! The only thing is I couldn't find "me" in any of the don'ts or do's! :)

    1. Maybe I'll have to write some more in this series later on, haha!

  2. I for one found this article and the other ones in this series funny and entertaining! Thanks for writing Michael, and I can't wait to read what you write next! It's always nice to see a guy's perspective.

  3. I also loved reading your articles! I hope to read more in the future!

  4. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts in these posts, Michael! These have been some of the most entertaining blog posts I've read in long time. Entertaining and thought provoking!

  5. this was great! thanks so much. possibly more in the future, you said?? :)

    1. Yes! I haven't written any more "don't be that girl" posts, but I do have another post up on InsideOut with my thoughts on girls letting guys know that they are into them (http://inside-out-girl.blogspot.com/2012/03/guys-perspective-should-i-let-him-know.html) and I will be writing another post as soon as some of my classes clear up!