From Boo-Boo-Fixer To Best Friend: The Value of Mothers

{By Rebekah Kimminau}

The title of this post is kind of an oxymoron. Mothers are amazing people, and though people may try to pin down their value, really, there is no set "value" of a mother. Because they are pricless.

My own mother has been a true testament of what a mother should look like. She has influenced just about everything I do - for good - and she is one of the many people I can't imagine my life without.

I think when you are younger, you don't really think about the value of your mother. She is someone who is there for you when you scrape your knee, she is the person who knows how to make the perfect braid, and for me, she was the teacher who I went to anytime I had a question in school. But as you grow up, and start doing things independently, going places on your own, without your mom, you start to learn that all the little things she did for you add up. 

And the older I have gotten, the more I have realized this. I was traveling with families for about 3 months of this past spring. I had a wonderful time, and many of the moms I nanny for are like my second mom, but, that being said, there is just no one like Mom. After being gone from my mom for quite some time, I started to realized, that soon I will be gone even longer (to midwifery school, and maybe eventually married.) And that I really didn't treasure my mom, and the times we spent together nearly as much as I should have. Especially during my teenage years. Between the time I was about 12-15 I went through the "normal" teenage phase. I was mad at the world, and since my world consisted of spending a lot of time with my mom, I was especially mad at her. I had a bad attitude towards her a lot of the time, and God bless her, I don't know how she handled me. But as I reflect back on those years, I regret everyone of the angry words spoken to her. This is the woman who not only carried me for 9 months and birthed me, but the person who put up with my colicky self for a year and then proceeded to spend many an hours planning things for my siblings and I to do, not even mentioning the cleaning, the cooking,  and the homeschooling. And a lot of the time I spent with her  during those years was not pleasant.

But when I was 15, and a lot of my attitude had improved, I started enjoying time with her again. And boy, how my life changed! We started spending time together, going on bike rides some afternoons around the neighborhood, and each night I would go in to get my hair braided for bed, and we would talk about the day. I found that when I opened up to her, and spent time with her, not only talking at her, but also listening to her, my attitude towards her changed. This is the same as in any other relationship you have; communication is KEY. These times are memories that will forever live in my mind. We talked about anything and everything. And as our schedules changed, we moved to a new city, and the times we spent together didn't work so well anymore, I found myself not only missing the times spent with her, but my attitude towards her was starting to go down hill again. Over the past few years I have continually worked on our relationship, and now have the most beautiful relationship I could ever imagine. Don't get me wrong. There were hard times. There were (and still are) times when she asks me to do stuff I don't want to do, and there are also still times when I don't respond in godly way towards her. But God taught me, (and is teaching me) that my relationship with my mother should be a priority in my life. Because God certainly gave us mothers for a reason. 

I am now 18, and our relationship has taken a turn. She is slowly backing out of the role as teacher and instructor, and more and more becoming my best friend. And though I will always look to her for godly wisdom and insight on things I don't have the years to understand, I am enjoying our moments of friendship so very much. We have started taking walks whenever we can squeeze them in (even if it's just 10 minutes to walk to our local RedBox and pick up a movie for movie night.) These walks not only give us a chance for some exercise and fresh air, but they also give us undivided time in which we can talk about life, I can gain wisdom on situations I have been wondering about, and she can talk to me about what has been going on. 

So I want to end by encouraging you, if you don't have a time you spend alone with your mom, find one. It can be something as simple as a 10 minute walk everyday, to going to the gym with her, doing the dishes with her each night, helping her bathe the little kids, making lunch together, sitting on the front porch for a few minutes each day, really, the possibilities are endless! You guys will not only get to know what’s going on in each other's life, but I am sure you will be able to glean some wisdom from her! (She has been alive a few more years than you, after all!)

This post is dedicated to my mother. For the woman who bathed me, changed me, taught me, led me to my Savior, and helped me thorough many situations I could not have gone through without her, Thank you. I treasure our Friendship higher then any other friendship in this world. You are a woman who I highly respect, and hope to have conversations for years to come. I praise God for you often.

What is one thing that your mother has taught you? What is something she always says?

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How Our (Future) Children View God - President or Best Friend?

{by Rebekah Kimminau}

A few months ago I was reading an article on teaching your children the catechism. It was talking about having your children from a young age start memorizing the catechism. (For those of you who don't know what a catechism is, it is a small book full of truth's about God, from the bible. Things such as: "Who is God's Son? Jesus." "Who created the world? God." "In how many days? 7.")

After reading the article I got to thinking about how I was hoping to have my (future) children someday do this. A few days ago, God brought the thoughts back into my mind. As I was pondering them, I had a great realization from God. I realized that there were two ways I could show God to my children. As if He was the President, or as if He was their best friend. 

When you get to thinking about it, the president does have a smilar role as God. He is there to lead and protect our nation, just as God is put in place to lead and protect us.  He sets up rules and laws for the betterment of the nation. Just as God set out laws in the bible for the betterment of us. 

But then you get to thinking, what does the president look like from a child's point of view. He looks like the guy who is way "up there". Though they know He exists, they also know they will probably never get a chance to meet him. He is the guy who's name they memorize is school along with what number president he is. So from their point of view, he is a guy who lives and breathes on the same planet as them (as well as lives in the same country), but has not much else to do with them.

Now let's see how a best friend is similar to God. A best friend (at least any of the one's I have had) would do just about anything to protect. They love you with passion, and are the people who are always available when you need them. (the president, on the other hand, may take a while for you to reach should you want to talk to him ;) A best friend is there for you because they LOVE you. Not because they are called by their "oath of office" to serve and protect you.

So which way do I want my (future) children to view God? As someone who they memorize facts about, or someone they can talk to anytime they would like. Defiantly, the latter. I believe teaching your (future) children from a young age that God is always going to be there for them, and always going to love them, no matter what, will give them a huge jump start in the relationship with Him. If when they think of God, they immediately think of someone that they can run to when troubles come, they can rely on when things around them fall apart, (just like I would say about my best friend) then they will have a wonderful start to their walk with the Lord.

p.s. This is not only wonderful ideas to teach your (future) children, but also great ideas to apply in your personal walk with God.

About Rebekah: I am a 17 year old girl who, strives everyday to live for the Lord. I don’t always live in Him, but I try. I have been home schooled all of my life, and I am an Air Force Brat. I have move 9 times in my life. I am the oldest of four, and I absolutely adore my family. I have had a passion for babies and children ever since I was little, and I spend most of my time babysitting. I currently live in the DC area.

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Why I Want a Big Family

{by Rebekah Kimminau}

It’s Christmas time. All of my family has gathered around one table to sit down and have a meal. Aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents. We are all quite close together, pushing each other’s elbows with each bite of ham and marshmallow topped sweet potatoes. But despite the close quarters, as I look around, I see smiles on each and every person’s face. We laugh, we share stories from the past year, we tell jokes. I observe all of this,  and my mind wanders to some distance land far down the road of life, when I will have a family of my own. And we will all be gathered around our own dining room table sharing the stories and laughter. And I think about having a table full of children, 6, 8, 10, maybe even a dozen. And I smile.

I have always loved children. Ever since I can remember I would stand by a mom for hours just waiting to hold her baby. When I was 10 I would tell people that I wanted a big family. When they asked how many kids, I liked to say 23. That always got quite the look.  And though back then I was young, and didn’t understand a lot of things about life, essentially my dream hasn’t changed.

I have gotten the chance to spend time in many people’s houses that have big families. I remember one particular time I was staying with a family that had 11 kids. They also had another family of 8 staying with them. There were 21 people total in their house. Now just the thought of that many people under one roof would make some people cringe. But me? I was in heaven. And to this day I look back at the time spent with them and wish I could go back. And yes, at times the house was crazy with children running everywhere, and preparing meals did take some effort, but it was fun. No, let me take that back. It was a blast. Have you ever had 5 teenage girls standing around kitchen preparing strawberry shortcake for 23 people? It’s quite loud, and filled with giggles. Or had family worship with 23 voices singing from age 1-40? It’s amazing. Each and every experience I have with a large family makes me want one more.

 

I do know that having a large family is not all fun and games. There is lots of work involved. Making sure you are caring for each and every child’s emotional and spiritual needs is a 24-hour, 7 days a week task. Not to mention laundry, cooking, cleaning and home schooling. But each and every thing you do in going to involve work, whether you have 2 or 20 children. Work is a part of life. Laundry for 20 people might just take some creativity. (Not to mention many hands makes for light work!) :)

One great benefit to have a large family is that children are never without a playmate. And laughter is a very common back-ground sound. And your car is always full of voices singing along to the radio. And though when you arrive somewhere you always get the question “is this a school?” I know it’s worth it. And hopefully someday I can tell you that from first hand experience.

 Because that is what I dream of. I dream of being a mama with a full house and a full heart. And as I come back to the present, and laugh and joke some more with the family I have sitting around the table at this moment, I am thankful for all God has given me. I have been blessed. And maybe someday, God will bless me even more with a full table of my own.

This has become one of my favorite sayings:

'You never regret the children you do have, only the ones you don't.'

rebekah with sweet children she has nannied for 2 years

About Rebekah: I am a 17 year old girl who, strives everyday to live for the Lord. I don’t always live in Him, but I try. I have been home schooled all of my life, and I am an Air Force Brat. I have move 9 times in my life. I am the oldest of four, and I absolutely adore my family. I have had a passion for babies and children ever since I was little, and I spend most of my time babysitting. I currently live in the DC area.

Photography Credit: Rebekah Kimminau

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